


Living for this

by HistoricLesbians



Category: Call the Midwife
Genre: 1950's, 1960's, Alternate Universe - 1970s, CTM, Call the Midwife - Freeform, F/F, In Love, LQBTQ, Labour, Lesbian Character, Non-Canon Relationship, Pregnancy, Pupcake - Freeform, Valucille, gays, in labour, lesbian friendships, vintage lesbians
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2019-12-27 03:51:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18296270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HistoricLesbians/pseuds/HistoricLesbians
Summary: I actually wrote this for Tumblr on which I received a prompt and then another prompt after I wrote the first part about them finding out they are expecting. See beginning notes for the prompts.In short terms, Valucille finds out they are expecting and are going to be parents.





	1. Patsy Delia Julienne Dyer

**Author's Note:**

> 1st Prompt: For Val and Lucille with their kids or finding out they are having kids?
> 
> 2nd Prompt: I loved the pregnancy prompt with Val and Lucille! could you do Lucille helping Valerie through the birth?
> 
> My Tumblr for anyone who wishes to send me prompts for Valucille, Pupcake or Turnadette; https://softpupcake.tumblr.com/

Valerie had been off her food the last few weeks, she knew she needed to tell Lucille, she just needed to find the right way, When they had chosen a donner Lucille had given Valerie full rein on when she would go to the clinic. She had said she wanted to be surprised, There, however, was no surprise with the way Valerie had been throwing up every morning and her biscuit intake had gone up which for Valerie in itself was impressive.

 

“Luc?” Valerie knocked on the bedroom door in their new home

 

“Everything alright?” Lucille asked just taking off her uniform after a very long shift delivering 3 babies to one woman.

 

“Yeah, Well, I mean no it is, it’s great I just I need to talk to you about something.”

 

“You want a sip of my tea, you look nervous?” Lucille asked.

 

“No, no the smell of the milk makes my stomach turn…”

 

“The smell of the milk?” Lucille frowned

 

“Yes.” Valerie took her wife’s hands into her own “Lucille love, I’m pregnant, we’re going to be having a baby.”

 

Both Valerie and Lucille beamed from ear to ear “OH MY - Oh petal!! Lucille took her wife’s face between her hands as she brushed her lips gently against Valerie’s own, who was in return demanding to be kissed harder, and Valerie quickly felt the rest of the world fall away. It was just Valerie, Lucille, and the little baby that Valerie was now carrying, in this one room.

 

It was them. It was always going to be them.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Valerie and Lucille both had the next two days of work, which was certainly unusual for them to both have a day to themselves at the same time.

 

 

The first day was absolutely perfect. It was December, and it had been snowing for the last couple of weeks it was also absolutely freezing, but that was okay as long as they were together that was more important than anything. They lived in a time where being gay was only legalized a few years ago and being able to have babies, well that was only just allowed too, it was still very difficult to be out in the open with their relationship and for their family.

 

 

Neither of them cared how difficult it would be they just needed each other, and at the end of the day, the people who knew them; friends and family like; Patsy, Delia, Trixie, Phyllis and Shelagh, they were the people who they counted on. They were the people that knew who Valerie and Lucille were and loved them for the people that they were and not because of their sexuality. Especially Patsy and Delia.

 

 

Being a midwife Valerie got to choose who would deliver her baby, everyone thought she’d choose Lucille, but Lucille didn’t want to and Valerie didn’t want her to either, she actually wanted Lucille to be holding her hand the whole time. She instead, without even a question had chosen Patsy to deliver her baby, she trusted her and she found Patsy to be the one she trusted to stay as calm as she could if anything did go wrong.

 

 

Valerie and Lucille decided to go for a walk, and go and do some shopping just the really small things, that to them they enjoyed doing together, things they missed out on when they were working almost 24/7. They had the perfect day, perfect evening too, cuddled up on the couch watching an episode of Doctor Who on television which Sister Monica-Joan had made them love.

 

 

At precisely 10 pm Lucille went up to bed and Valerie made herself a cup of tea to take up to bed with her which she did every time she went to bed. However, although she didn’t know it yet, everything was about to change.

 

 

Valerie was walking up the stairs with her cup, she then felt her first labor pain, but Valerie being Valerie, she just went up the stairs put her tea next to the bed and got in next to Lucille. She didn’t think there was any need to worry her until there was a need for Patsy, so she drank her tea before trying to sleep as best she could until about 4 am when she woke not able to take the pain any longer.

 

 

“Luc! Luc!” Valerie sat up, breathing heavily and shaking Lucille awake

 

 

“Val?” Lucille woke up suddenly, seeing Valerie sat up on her knees facing and clutching the headboard. “Valerie, how long have you been in labor?” Lucille asked standing up and running to the other side of the bed and picking up the phone.

 

 

“Since I came to bed at 10-”

 

 

“Valerie! You should have woken me!” Lucille said, with a frustrated tone lacing her voice.

 

 

“Why? So you could be sat up worrying until we needed to call Patsy? Which in turn would have me sitting up worrying about you, worrying about me. Neither of us needed the worry and you know it, love.” Valerie replied softly, holding her breath before letting out a whimper of pain “Just call Patsy!”

 

 

Lucille dialed the number quickly, whilst rubbing soothing circles on her wife’s back.

 

 

“Nonnatus house, midwife speaking, how can I help?” Patsy Mount asked as she answered the phone.

 

 

“Patsy it’s Lucille, Valerie sh-”

 

 

“LUC! JUST TELL HER  THAT I AM IN A FUCKING LABOUR - ARRRGGHHHHHH!!” Valerie screamed out.

 

“The doors open Patsy,” Lucille stated

 

 

“I’m on my way.” Patsy replied, and hung up the phone, grabbing everything she needed before making her way, cycling over to Valerie and Lucille’s home.

 

 

Lucille stayed with Valerie, rubbing her back “Maybe sitting or laying down would be better?” Lucille asked gently

 

 

“No! No! - wait - no grab me the bowl I’m gonna be sick!” Valerie cried, she had a really, very intense fear of being sick. Everyone else’s, no issue but her own she was terrified.

 

 

Lucille grabbed the bowl passing it to Valerie, who was quite literally trying not to throw up, even though her body was needing to. “Val, petal, your body needs to. I’m here, alright? Nothing bad will happen.”

 

 

Valerie nodded, in floods of tears as she gave in, letting her body do what it needed to.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Soon Patsy walked through the door and up to the bedroom of the couple “Oh dear, what’s been going on here then?” Patsy asked as she put down her bag and getting her surgical gloves onto her hands.

 

 

“She’s thrown up a few times.” Lucille whispered.

 

 

“Nothing we can’t deal with.” Patsy smiled “Lucille why don’t you go and wash that out and then bring it back up.”

 

 

Lucille nodded doing as she was told, whilst Patsy not taking a no for an answer, helped Valerie of her knees and laying on her back “Have your waters broken yet?”

 

 

“No.” Valerie replied as she clutched the pillow in her hand above her head, trying to pant and quite frankly, just to breathe.

 

 

“Okay, first we need to get your bottoms off and your knickers too.” Patsy smiled in a reassuring manner, as she helped Valerie out of them leaving her in just a pajama top, which wouldn’t take long to come off too.  "Now legs apart sweetie… that’s it, I’m just going to check and see how far along we are.”

 

 

Valerie nodded, as she screamed with another contraction, and Lucille was back in the room. Luc went and sat quickly on the bed, putting the bowl on the table next to her. before she wrapped an arm around Valerie, and with the other held her hand.

 

 

Patsy finished up examining her "Valerie, I’m going to have to break your waters for you.”

 

 

“What?! Why?” Val asked in a knowing panic.

 

 

“Because it’s nearly time for you to push and waters still haven’t broken on their own.”

 

 

Valerie nodded “Wait before you do I need to get out of this top, it’s too hot.”

 

 

Lucille helped her wife remove the rest of her clothing before she sat behind Valerie holding her in her arms and pushing her hair from her face. “I’ve got you, babe.”

 

 

Valerie quickly grabbed Lucille’s free hand, giving Patsy the nod to do what she needed to.

 

 

“Ready?”

 

 

“Just do it Patsy, please - OH GOD AHHHHHHHH!” Valerie let out another small scream as a contraction hit “I need to push!”

 

 

“No, not yet, I need to break your waters, legs apart. That’s it.” Patsy elbowed Valerie’s knees apart properly “Stay like that, take a deep breath sweetie.”

 

 

Valerie breathed in slowly, and Patsy carefully broke her waters “There we are.”

 

 

Valerie at this point was just screaming on a constant loop.

 

 

“Screaming won’t help you, babe.” Lucille tried

 

 

“Well, then you try pushing another fucking human being out a very small hole in your body!! ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH  I NEED TO FUCKING PUSH!”

 

 

Patsy had another check “Valerie, you’re ready, push with all that strength I know you have.”

 

 

Valerie let out a blood-curdling scream, squeezing at Lucille’s hands and pushing with all her might, and she pushed and pushed and pushed.

 

 

“Have a quick breather and then with the next push we should have baby’s head” Patsy Smiled, with a hand on Valerie’s knee “You have this, doesn’t she Lucille?”

 

 

“Absolutely, she’s the strongest, bravest woman I know.”

 

 

“She has to say that she’s my wife.” Valerie smiled through her tears and got ready to push again.

 

 

“You can do this Valerie, a strong hard push, scream your head off if needs must but you must have the energy to push your baby out.” Patsy said firmly.

 

 

Valerie took some deep breath before giving another had push as she screamed her way through “And we have a head! Stop pushing, stop-”

 

 

“W-what? why? what’s wrong?” Valerie asked shakily.

 

 

“Cord wrapped around your baby’s neck, nothing we can’t sort out - ” Patsy slowly unwrapped the cord from the baby’s neck “There we go. Valerie in the next couple of pushes you will have your baby in your hands, you can do this. Now push!” Patsy said firmly, with the care in her voice that she had in everything she did and said.

 

 

“I can’t…I’m too tired…” Valerie cried, shaking her head leaning back into her wife.

 

 

“Valerie you can”

 

 

“I can’t!”

 

 

“Valerie, I love you but you gotta do this, for you and for us.” Lucille piped in, trying to convince her wife to push again.

 

 

Valerie was in tears, but she gathered her strength, squeezing again at Lucille’s hand and giving everything into the last few pushes. She was sure everyone in Australia would have been able to hear her with the earth-shattering screams.

 

 

“AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!” Valerie screamed before hearing the cries of her baby and she herself was crying too leaning back into Lucille.

 

 

“You have a beautiful, crying baby girl!” Patsy beamed and cut the cord before wrapping the little girl in a towel and handing her to Valerie who happily took her into her arms, allowing her daughter to take a hold of her little finger with her fist. “Well aren’t you just something else.” Valerie cried.

 

 

In fact, everyone, including Patsy was now crying, it was a room full of waterworks at the beauty that had just come of the birth.

 

 

“Tell her.” Lucille looked from Valerie to Patsy.

 

 

“Tell me what?” Patsy looked up a little confused.

 

 

“Lucille had come to the decision a few months ago that we would name her after our favorite people in this world, that’s you and Delia…”

 

 

“So, what are you naming her?”

 

 

Valerie looked to Lucille before back at Patsy “Her name is Patsy Delia Julienne Dyer - Julienne as well, after Sister Julienne because she has always been there from the day I was born.”

 

 

“I- I’m honored. I don’t deserve it but I am truly honored.” Patsy smiled before seeing Valerie wince a little “Looks like the afterbirth is on its way, Val pass, your daughter over to your wife while I help you deliver the after birth.”

 

 

Valerie did exactly that, and Lucille walked around the room a little with baby Patsy, who was fast asleep already.

 

 

Patsy delivered the afterbirth. checking it over she realized very quickly some of it hadn’t come away and she went back to Valerie who had now lost a quite a bit of blood and was as pale as anything and getting weaker. “Lucille, I need you to phone for an ambulance. Now.” Patsy grabbed the needle, injecting Val with what she needed to help deliver the rest of the afterbirth.

 

 

Lucille rang for the ambulance and soon enough, they were all, including Pasty being taken to The London Hospital.


	2. Christmas spirits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arguments, loss, happiness, friendship and family. What else could Christams be about?

**Sorry it’s taken me so long to get around to writing this up. My Nan passed away just over five months ago and Call The Midwife was a showwe would watch and talk about together, and one I was watching when I got the news of her passing. So it's been hard and you'll understand why I added certain topics in here.**

 

**Anyway I hope you like it!**

 

* * *

  
  


After Valerie’s stint in the hospital after a slightly difficult birth she was finally allowed to go home, and her and Lucille and baby Patsy were a family in their own home. Lucille was running after Valerie hand foot and finger, and Valerie was hating it.

 

“Lucille! That’s enough-”

 

“Valerie, I almost lost you!”

 

“But you didn’t, Lucille, you must remember, you did not lose me.” Valerie replied, taking a small breath “Now will you let me make myself a simple cup of tea?”

 

“Yes, yes. I’m sorry Val, I just -”

 

“You’re scared. You almost lost me, I know but you have got to stop fretting and not letting me do anything and most importantly you have got to let me carry our baby upstairs. The doctors and nurses all said I was more than capable and I have the strength to do so. You know that I do too, as a Midwife and Nurse, you know these things Lucille.”

  
  


Valerie finally seemed to have gotten through to her wife, she loved Valerie more than anything, but she was treating her like she was about to break. Which for Valerie was making her just want to shake Lucille and scream at her.

 

“Luc, you have to let us breathe, as a family we have to breathe. It’s Christmas in exactly two weeks. We should be happy, we should be relaxed..”

 

Lucille just gave Valerie a look, making Val shake her head “Okay, fine, so as relaxed as we can be. I’m not saying it will be easy, or calm. But Lucille, what is Christmas, if it isn’t a little complex and mad and most of all joyous and just being with the people you would call family, the people you love.”

 

“So we’re going to Nonnatus for Christmas?”

 

“We’re going to Nonnatus for Christmas. Oh c’mon Luc, cheer up!  you’ll love it.”

 

Valerie sighed, forgetting all about that cup of tea she was originally going to make and walked out the room, making her way towards the stairs.

 

“Valerie, I can-”

 

“LUCILLE FUCKING ANDERSON! WILL YOU FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LET ME SEE TO OUR DAUGHTER.” Valerie snapped “I can manage.”

 

Lucille rolled her lip into her mouth a little, and throwing her hands into the air.

 

* * *

  
  


**13 DAYS LATER**

 

 

  
  


Valerie had been working all the hours that Sister Julienne was able to give her, she needed and wanted them. Valerie hadn’t spoken to Lucille properly since they had an argument, and so she was picking up as many shifts as she possibly could, but she had to go home on Christmas Eve, or she figured Valerie might actually kill her with Patsy’s help. Even if she knew that wasn’t true, she wasn’t going to risk it.

 

“Val? I’m home.” Lucille almost fell through the door, tripping over her own feet from exhaustion. As soon as she closed the front door and walked into the living room she called out again “Babe? I’m home? Look we really need to talk.”

  
  


Lucille frowned, it was unusual for Valerie to not at least come down to see her when she arrived home, and after searching all downstairs, Lucille began to worry. She threw her red coat and white scarf over the back of the couch and kicked of her shows, making her way upstairs. Lucille knocked gently on the bedroom door “Valerie?” she whispered, and smiling upon seeing the image as she entered the room.

  
  


As she entered, she saw Valerie curled up on the bed asleep, with baby Patsy also asleep in her arms safely. Lucille climbed on the bed next to them and watching her girls quietly, before she ran her fingers gently through Valerie’s now shoulder length brunette hair. 

  
  


Valerie soon woke up, smiling as soon as she saw her wife “Luc? Lucille! Your home.” Valerie said with a grogginess to her voice.

 

“Yes, I’m home. Valerie, I need to talk to you about something.”

 

Valerie, knew in her heart what this was about, so she slowly sat up, stretching and cracking her neck a little (which Lucille hated!) ,she rubbed her eyes and cradled her little girl in her arms as she crossed her legs so that she was sitting, facing her wife.

 

“Valerie this is about-”

 

“No, no Lucille, I know what it’s about. It’s about the argument we had a few weeks ago. I’m sorry I was really grouchy with you and I became all hot headed and I know you were just trying to help, but you were doing everything for me, if I was to improve I had to do some-things for myself, you understand that right?” Valeried sighed, as the frown lines increased across her head.

  
  


Lucille just looked up at Valerie “Yes. I understand but that’s not what I was going to talk to you about.”

  
  


“Oh, alright then. What-”

  
  


“Just let me speak okay?”

  
  


At this point Valerie just nodded, not wanting to interrupt at any point.

  
  


“Remember about a month ago I wrote to my Grandmother, I told her the news of our baby, well my Mother replied which, I received three days ago.” Lucille’s voice was cracking, and her eyes began to water, she was trying with all her might not to let herself cry but she was about to combust with the emotion.

 

“Lucille? Baby, what’s happened?”

 

“She’s died, Valerie my Grandmother is gone! I’m never gonna see her again.” Lucille just let go of the emotions she was trying to hide.

 

Valerie quickly stood up with baby Patsy putting her in her carry cot, and coming back to the bed where Lucille was sat, sobbing.

 

“Luc, why didn’t you tell me?”

 

“I - I thought I could cope with it on my own, I thought you were mad at me.”

 

“Oh god, Lucille, my love, listen to me..” Valerie cupped Lucilled face gently, but holding her tight “You can tell me anything, you don’t need to keep things from me, especially things as important as this.”

 

Lucille simply nodded, before she let her head fall out of Valerie’s hands and onto her lap instead, as she continued to sob, she just let out a scream, she felt like her whole world was crumbling, like there was a black hole inside of her. Lucille’s Grandmother, she well she was like another Mother to her, she helped to raise her, she was always there, she was her best friend, and she couldn’t imagine a world where she wasn’t in it.

  
  


“I want her back. I want her back, I WANT HER BACK! SHE WASN’T EVEN SICK!”

  
  


“What do you mean love?” Valerie asked as she began rubbing soothing circles on Lucille’s back.

  
  


“She just - she collapsed and then - and now she’s no longer - Valerie, I just want the pain to be gone, I just want it to be gone!”

 

“I know, I know, it’s not fair, I’m so sorry Lu-”

 

“Sorry?” Lucille sat up “What are you sorry for? Your not my bastard God, that took her away from me for the rest of this lifetime. Valerie -” Lucille began to almost hyperventilate from the tears and panic in her sobbing.

 

“Lucille, sweetie. I need you to breathe for me, I know you feel like your world is crumbling right now but-”

 

“FEEL LIKE?! No, no, it is, it is! My Grandmother is dead Valerie! She’s dead, It hurts so bad I can’t, I can’t breathe, I can’t do worse, I can’t I just want this to end.” Lucille began lashing her arms at Valerie’s chest, who lucky for Valerie she was able to grab her arms and just hold her tight until she was calm again. “She’s dead…and she’s not coming back…” Lucille cried exhausted from her emotions.

 

“Lucille, you will get through this and I will be here with our daughter every step of the way.” Valerie sighed, kissing the top of Lucille’s head and rocking her gently  in her arms “I love you Luc.”

  
  
  


Valerie made sure she phoned sister Julienne to let her know ahead of time what had happened, at Sister Julienne was always good with her words, always knew the right thing to say. She simply told Valerie to be kind and patient and that everyone deals with grief differently.

 

* * *

  
  


**Christmas Day**

  
  


Lucille crashed at about 2am, after an almost loop of her crying and vomiting and crying and vomiting. Valerie was up every few hours with the baby anyway, so it wasn’t an issue. At about 6:30am, baby Patsy began crying, and so Valerie woke herself up and picked her daughter up, going downstairs with her. Valerie switched on the kettle and went and sat on the couch, taking of her pyjama top and placing baby patsy on her breast to feed her. She wasn’t there for too long before Lucille came down the stairs and went and made the tea bringing it through and setting the tray, with the cups and sugar and small jug of milk on the coffee table. Lucille gave Valerie a quick peck on the lips and then gave Patsy a quick kiss on her beautiful soft head “Mmm, you both smell amazing.”

  
  


Valerie just laughed “Do I not just smell like sick and milk?”

  
  


“No? Why?”

 

“Patsy threw up on me on her last feed, and the milk... well the milk.” Valerie scrunched up her nose, motioning to what she was doing with their baby.

 

Lucille just nodded, sipping her tea, feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders. As she looked at Valerie however,  she knew she wasn’t alone in the world. Lucille had her family, they were right here, right in this very room and at Nonnatus house.

 

“I’m the luckiest woman alive, I’m sure of it.”

 

“Now dear, that would be us. Right Pats? Yes, I know she thinks she’s lucky but we are definitely more lucky to have her as your mother and my wife.” Patsy smirked looking up at Lucille “Now love, I know you told me not to get you anything, but there are two -  wait no three preseents under the tree for you. Two of them we can take to Nonnatus but there is one should open here.”

  
  


“Okay…” Lucille put her cup of tea down and walked over to their very traditional Christmas tree, and knelt down, picking up the presents that sat under the tree and checking each label for her name and Valerie’s name, when Lucille managed to find the three presents she held them up for Valerie to point out.

 

Valerie pointed to the bigger present, that was wrapped in sparkling silver paper, different to the other wrapping paper that the other presents were wrapped in. Lucille came and sat back down, and Valerie was preparing herself for Lucille to cry. Patsy had just finished feeding, and Valerie had the cloth over her shoulder ready, she lifted her baby up slowly holding her against her chest making sure her head was above her shoulder and she began patting Patsy’s back slowly, as she watched Lucille open her gift.

  
  


Lucille took her time in opening it, and as soon as she did as soon as she did, it was the most perfect gift she could have asked for on a day like today, Lucille just cried, she cried and she cried and she cried.

 

“So you like it then?”

 

However just before Lucille could answer, baby Patsy did the loudest burp that both Valerie and Lucille had ever heard from a baby. They both just bust out laughing, that burp really was quite timely.

  
  


“Oh Valerie, I love it. Where did you find the photograph?” Lucille asked still looking down and holding tight to her gift. 

 

Late last night when Lucille was fast asleep, Valerie got up with patsy and went through Lucille’s family album to find a photograph of Lucille and her Grandmother and she then went over to Nonnatus House to see if they might have a beautifully simple photo frame to put the black and white photograph in.

  
  


“I found it in your family album.”

  
  


“Oh, it’s just perfect.”

  
  


Over the next few hours, they all spent time together opening some more presents each, Lucille bought Valerie a little silver hearted locket with a photo of the three of them on one side, and a photo of Valerie and her Grandmother in the other. 

 

Then they all had a wash and put on some clothes and made their way over to Nonnatus House around midday, with Patsy all snuggled up in her pram and in a little hat and mittens with a nice warm blanket covering her.

 

They didn’t even arrive at the doors before the redhead, who delivered their baby came rushing out “You’re here! The gays are here! Thank god!”

  
  


“Patsy keep your voice down would you!” Delia came running out after her wife “Sorry Lucille, sorry Val, she’s had a lot to drink, yes already I know!”

  
  


“Hey it’s Christmas! If I WANT TO DRINK I will drink, shhhh! They have a baby! The called her Patsy but know one must know!” Patsy giggled into Delia’s arms.

 

“That’s it. I’m taking you inside. Oh here’s Sister Julienne, i’ll come and find you in a moment alright?” Delia called back as she walked her very drunk wife back up the stairs of Nonnatus and inside.

 

Valerie and lucille just looked at one another in almost disbelieve of what they had just witnessed but also a silent understanding that Christmas at Nonnatus house would be the best Christmas they would ever have. It would be a perfect first Christmas as a family, this is where they belonged, now and until the end of time.

  
  



End file.
